🎓 Why Do Independent Schools Ask If You've Registered Elsewhere? And Should You Tell the Truth?

As an education consultant and a parent, I’ve sat on both sides of the school admissions table. One of the more uncomfortable — and sometimes confusing — questions families get asked during independent school interviews is:

"Have you registered for other schools?"

It seems like a harmless, logistical question. But in reality, it's layered with subtle implications. What is the school really trying to find out? Are they testing your loyalty, judging your choices, or just making conversation?

Let’s break this down — not just with strategy, but with clarity, honesty, and intention, so you and your child can walk into interviews with confidence and integrity.

🧠 What’s Really Behind the Question?

1. It’s About Predictability, Not Jealousy

Many parents worry this is a loyalty test. “If I say we’ve registered elsewhere, will they think we’re not serious about this school?” The reality is — schools don’t expect to be your one and only. They’re used to competition.

What they’re trying to understand is:👉 How likely are you to accept an offer if we make one?

Each offer a school extends is a commitment. If too many students reject offers, they’re forced to dip into waitlists — which affects staffing, timetables, and even reputation. So your answer helps them predict yield, not punish you for being open-minded.

2. It Offers a Glimpse Into Your Decision-Making Style

Schools want to understand the why behind your choices — not just the what. If you’ve registered for three wildly different schools (say, an all-boys boarding school, a progressive day school, and an elite academic pressure-cooker), the admissions team may wonder:

• Does this family know what kind of education they really want?

• Have they researched what our school stands for?

This isn’t about judgment — it’s about fit. Independent schools are often niche by nature. They want students who will thrive in their culture, not just any school with a decent ranking.

3. They’re Reading the Parents As Much As the Child

Here’s the truth many families don’t realise: interviews aren’t just about assessing the student. Schools are quietly evaluating the parents too.

Are you collaborative? Realistic? Prepared? The way you talk about your school choices reveals how you handle uncertainty, pressure, and planning — all of which are critical in a long-term school-family relationship.

So when they ask if you’ve applied elsewhere, they’re not just checking off a box. They’re observing how you think, speak, and prioritise.

💬 So — Should You Tell the Truth?

The short answer is yes. But the real question is: How do you tell the truth with clarity and maturity?

Here’s how to do it well:

✅ Be Transparent, But Anchor Your Answer in Purpose

Rather than defensively listing all six schools, try:

“Yes, we’ve registered for a few other schools that we felt matched our child’s profile. But this school stood out to us because of [your school’s strong mentoring programme, small class sizes, pastoral care… insert what truly matters to your family].”

You’ve acknowledged other options, but shifted the spotlight back to the school you’re speaking to. That’s what they’ll remember.

✅ Speak From a Place of Calm and Conviction

If you're nervous and trying to “sell” your family, you may overcompensate or come across as evasive. Instead, speak honestly:

“We believe in keeping our options open during this process, but we’re being selective. Your school is one that genuinely aligns with our values — we’re not just chasing league tables.”

That kind of response reassures the school that you’re grounded, not panicked.

❌ What to Avoid:

• Don’t lie — schools talk. Especially in London and the Southeast, admissions offices have informal networks.

• Don’t overshare — listing every single school can make you look scattergun or anxious.

• Don’t say “We haven’t thought about it yet” — it sounds unprepared.

🪞 From a Consultant’s Perspective: What I Tell My Clients

In my experience, the best families — the ones who come across as serious but open-minded, decisive but kind — are those who prepare not with scripts, but with self-awareness.

You’re not just applying to schools. You’re building relationships. You’re seeking alignment between your child’s personality and a school’s ethos. So don’t be afraid to share your process — as long as it’s thoughtful.

Interviews are not about perfect answers. They’re about honest connection. Show schools that you're not trying to "play the game" — you're trying to make the right long-term decision, for the right reasons.

✍️ Final Thought

Independent school admissions are about more than just getting in. They’re about finding your people — a community where your child will be understood, challenged, and supported.

So when a school asks, “Have you registered anywhere else?”, hear it for what it is: an invitation to share your values, your journey, and your clarity.

Answer it with confidence, humility, and direction — and you’ll leave the kind of impression that goes far beyond test scores.

📩 Have more questions about school interviews, applications, or which schools might suit your child’s unique personality? Feel free to drop me a message or book a 1-to-1 consultation.

You don’t have to do this alone — and you don’t have to second-guess your every move.